9th
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVOURITE GUITARIST (BESIDES MIYAVI)—URUHA!!!11!!1!11ONEONEELEVEN!! (aka urupon :3)
/end caps abuse
there's no guitarist more Awesome and Sexier than you <3
that’s a capital A and S, and the statement only applies to guitarists (excluding miyavi because that’s a different case HAHA)
j00 continue to rock hard on your pretty potbelly and wear more garters k XD
now if you can successfully quit smoking (BWAHA <- couldn’t resist the laugh) i’ll spam you with some moet 8D
yup, so drink yourself senseless on this birthday of yours!
as for now reita is still the <3 and shou’s engriz eez sho funneh itz bringin’ bac tha LULZ! XDDDD
/endcrack
8th
stuck on Katherine in the Trunk by Gazette. i can't decide if it's old school rock or rock'n'roll. i never did give much notice this song before but i've come to enjoy it alot because it's fun and has playful feeling, the kind of song i’d imagine that if it was performed in a small underground club, i'd be dancing on the table doing some goofy dance moves and enjoying the music while being a complete idiot. it's also a good break from all the loud heavy stuff i normally listen to. and in fact, i really like the basslines in here! so much so that i forgot to pay attention to the wonderful guitar solos XD oh reita <3 even with the song being melodious, you never know if the lyrics says otherwise. Gazette's music always covers up a lot of the underlying meaning. so i'm looking into the lyrics now and see if i can get anything out of it.
yup, so on repeat.
7th
too dependant on you recently. you were always there for me when you're... there. but other than that i'm just waiting for you, waiting till it's just a few hours to midnight so that we can have late night chats again. i really enjoy every session we have, be it crazy spazzing or deep talks about.. anything, or just trying to help me sort my life out. but you never leave me anything to do for you in return for you except write and just be there to listen when you're feeling messed. you just disappear, and when you do there's no one to assure me or to stop me from feeling all weak. i think your presence and words never fail to hold on to me, even if i'm on the brink of falling.
& even if you couldn't always be there, i realised that you're still with me after all these years. i've watched us grow, and i couldn't be more thankful to have a friend like you around.
6th
i drew stuff! i don't normally like to draw properly (sketching and doodling isn't counted) because the process is painfully slow especially when i want it to turn out decent. sometimes decent in my dictionary means perfect, depending on what i'm working on. and then once i draw i can't be bothered to colour it in. i like it rough and sketchy with pencil lines and everything, but i know that if it's coloured it will look better.
annoyed because no one's ever there to support/encourage me when i make decisions. very used to doing things alone. most of the time i like it, and then there are times that i hate the distance i put between myself and others.
if i could ask God something before i die i want to ask him to reveal to me in what kind of things did i have the potential in, what could i have been a natural at, maybe some special talents that i possessed just that i never had the chance or the opportunity to develop or maybe time just wasn't in my favour to prove me and my 'whatever i do turns out just average anyway' mindset wrong. i pray that he'll reply me something that i want to hear.
will teach my left-handed american friend how to use chopsticks soon (:
since i'm wasting my days, i'm also grumbling about how i should get a job and earn money for myself because i think i need it to back me up whenever i decide to do something when no one’s going to give me support. need a damn job. but i'm too lazy to look for one.
need to go shopping (i hate the summer fashion btw), translate and do homework and study. also need to get rid of people on my msn list because i don’t know what the fuck they’re still doing there. it’s an eyesore. SO BUHBYE!
5th
i'm just too unsettled/restless/bored/unfocused to do anything. be it work or anything that i like to do, it's just not working out for me. even in my playlist, there's not one song that i can listen to the entire thing without pressing the next button. and i'm too unmotivated to do the things that i like to do. i sleep for like 13 hours if i can and the remaining time when i'm awake i waste away my time and can't get anything done properly because i'm not in the mood to do a single thing. hate days like this the most.
construction work has been going on right outside my room since forever. they're doing piling works now. i slept at 4am and before i knew it it was morning and they've started piling like OMFGWTFBBQSKEDUGHR!!!11!11!ELEVENONEONE! it's eating my brains out. i can't watch television. i can still hear the noise though i have loud music plugged into my ears. i'm too lazy to get out of the house and to someplace quieter.
i woke up at 3pm and barely touched my lunch. don't know why but my appetite has been terrible. i feel hungry but i’m bloated even before i'm done with half of my food. i watched television with the volume at full blast. i came online. said i'll do my homework at 5pm, but nope, i'm still surfing through my playlist and getting frustrated 'cause there's no right song. i read the sentence on my sheet of homework over and over until like.. 6pm? tried translating something else, tried to do some graphics, tried to read, tried to do almost everything that i thought i would LIKE to do but did none.
it's now 7pm and i feel better that night is coming. the night definitely makes things better. hopefully i can finish up something.
i need to stop whining. great, another day gone.
recently it’s been the odd sleeping hours of 3 to 3 and really unhealthy eating habits.
let’s use some keywords shall we:
fucking. exasperated.
4th
this entry has been lurking as a draft for too long.
